We're only here to find the love that lingers after...

Day 19 -A song from your favorite album

Coeur D'Alene - The Head and the Heart

I fell in love with these guys a little while ago after itunes recommended them after I bought an Avett Brothers cd. Since then I've been listening non stop! The cd as a whole is amazing, I can sit and listen to the whole thing from start to finish without getting tired of a single song. After I find a band I love I look them up on youtube to see if they're any good live. When I looked these guys up I found this video. HOLY CHEESE BATMAN! They blew my mind. How does a band sound this great live?! Needless to say, I HAVE to marry an indie folk guy! I couldn't date a guy if he told me he didn't like this stuff. Yeah, I'm serious... I once dated a guy who pretty much only listened to Disney music. Shoot me in the face! Luckily I know a pretty wicked awesome kid who will let me talk music with him. He even uses words like coolio and gnarly. He doesn't know it but I pretty much adore him. And this is what my life has become, I judge a guy by the music he likes. I think I'm obsessed...

Love and Rockets,

Rodney

p.s. 43 days until I'm back here...

Doing this...

Day 18 - A song that you wish you heard on the radio

....

If you read my blog you would have read that I hate the radio. I won't get into that again! So instead of requesting a band I adore on the radio just to have them ruined, I'll name drop like crazy here and rest assured that you won't become obsessed and end up having them played on the radio. Bands need recognition, and I realize it's dumb of me to not want to hear them on the radio but want them to get recognition. So NAME DROP!

Check out:

Alexi Murdoch

Andrew Bird

Ben Gibbard (The lead singer from Death Cab For Cutie, also married to Zoey Deschanel. Check out their awesome duet here)

Greg Laswell

The Guggenheim Grotto

The Head and the Heart

Jeff Buckley

Jon Foreman (The lead singer from Switchfoot)

Joshua James

Katie Herzig

Kyle Andrews

Laura Marling

Libbie Linton

The Mollies

Needtobreathe

Nellie McKay

Noah & The Whale

Patrick Park

Phopho Bandits (how could I resist?!)

Ray LaMontagne

Slow Club

The Weepies

I can almost guarantee that if you like one of these bands you will like all of them! So go ahead, I dare you to look up at least 2 of them and see if you can stop after that!

Love and Rockets,

Rodney

p.s. I had my wisdom teeth taken out yesterday, crazy high Kristen on video? Stay tuned!!

Shake That.

Day 17 - A song you hear often on the radio

Party Rock Anthem - LMFAO

I love this song.

When I wasn't able to listen to my ipod in the car I thought I was going to die.

And I just about did.

No I'm not being dramatic.

"Get over it".

I know that's what you're all thinking.

I hate the radio.

I hate the songs on the radio.

If I hear a song I like I start disliking that song.

It has be be a great song,

one that really makes me feel the music,

in order for me to keep enjoying it after I've heard it on the radio.

There's not much to say about this particular song.

Except I'm going to learn how to dance to it,

just like this.

Go watch it,

go dance it,

go shake that!

Love and Rockets,

Rodney

By all means, take the front seat...

I don't know how to feel.

I can't be mad.

By all means, I have absolutely no reason to be mad.

It's not like they did this to hurt me.

They probably have no clue just how hard I'm taking this.

I can only sit here in shock.

The unthinkable has happened.

I thought things were going to turn out differently.

I thought I'd walk away with a smile.

Instead I sat there holding back the tears that were inevitable,

Laughing to cover the ones that escaped.

Here I sit.

In the backseat.

Don't worry, I've grown quite accustomed to all this space.

But when one calls shotgun and another jumps in,

especially when it's such a nice car,

one can only be a little deflated to sit alone in the back seat.

I know the seats well.

I've sat here before.

I know the motions to go through.

So why is it so hard this time?

Why was it suddenly next to impossible to breathe?

Why do I let this keep happening?

Why does it hurt so bad to think about?

Why can't I go through the motions this time?

I'm too scared to even glance at the seat now.

Why covet what I'll never have?

The best seat I'll get will be on a motorcycle.

No passenger.

The space will be suffocating.

Here I sit,

In the back seat,

Watching the passenger in shotgun have such a lovely time.

Deep breaths,

this could be a long ride.

This is turning out to be a Bad Romance...

Day 16 - A song that you used to love but now you hate

Bad Romance - Lady Gaga

I used to like this song, now I don't. It's that simple really. It brings back bad memories... awful memories. The biggest mistake I've probably ever made.

That's all I'm going to say.

Love and Rockets,

Rodney

p.s. I love driving in huge rain storms, there's simply nothing better!!

Alas I cannot swim...

Day 15 - A song that describes you

Alas I Cannot Swim - Laura Marling

I've been dreading this blog post because I know I'll finally have to open up and admit things I don't really want to admit. So here goes nothing...

This song is almost verbatim my life.

"There's a house across the river but alas I cannot swim,

And a garden of such beauty that the flowers seem to grin.

There's a house across the river but alas I can not swim,

I'll live my life regretting that I never jumped in."

I went on a nice little trip tonight up to Silver Lake with 4 of the most amazing girls I know. We joked around, did some planking, walked in mud, and had some great discussions. As we got going we were talking about our "Blind sides" and when they started to say mine I could feel myself falling into that same old rut.

I'm not going to tell you what my blind sides are but suffice it to say, I'm too scared to do anything. I let so many things hold me back from living my life. Well really just one thing that trickles down into a lot of little things.

Without going into too much detail, I'll just say that I'm sick. This sickness can bring a variety of troubles into my life. It could disable me. It causes me immense pain. It even causes me to refrain from spending too much time in the sun. But the scariest thing you ask? It could very well take my life.

I remember as a kid watching my aunt go through the same thing. And I remember the phone call with the awful news of her passing.

I think this is what haunts me the most. As I look forward in life and try to plan things I can't. I want to limit the amount of people my family will have to call when my fate befalls me. So when it comes to relationships, whether they be romantic or purely platonic I can't help but withhold for fear of what I will put the other through.

I see the life I could live. I see the house across the river with the flowers that grin. I see the life across the river that was meant for me, instead I choose to live my life in constant misery. I see all these things but it's not the life that has unfolded before me. Instead I must stay on my side of the river and watch my friends and family on the other side of the river. I hold back from the hours of fun. Hold back from the memories. Hold back from life.

I was saying tonight how hard it is to keep going. To keep a cheery attitude when everything I hold dear is slipping through my fingers. Why should I please those who will never be pleased, when I can't give them the life they deserve to be living?

I just want to jump in and go across the river to the life I should be living on the other side. I can see it, the life I would have had this sickness never manifested itself. How I yearn for it!! I can't hep myself when I find myself on the path to the river only to get to the shore to remember I cannot swim. I must let the other person go. I can't hold them back from the life they should be living.

I look at the ways it's held me back. I missed more than 1/2 of my high school experience. The hardest part is that I was friends with the SBO's so of course whenever we get together 87% of the conversation is about high school. I have no input. My life consists of memories of my bedroom ceiling. I know the lines, I know the pattern of that ceiling. I learned how to shut myself down before I really go to thinking about the situation I'm in.

So this song is my wish. I wish I could go smell the flowers, fall for the guy with the short black curly hair, take the dive. I wish I could overcome my fears and just leap. But alas I cannot swim.

Love and Rockets,

Rodney

p.s. I literally cannot swim. Swimming lessons anyone?

Come Go With Me

Day 14 - A song that no one would expect you to love

Come Go With Me - The Del-Vikings

I'm a big fan 50's Doo-Wop music. My mom used to put on the American Graffiti soundtrack and we'd listen to it while doing chores. You can't help but listen to the whole soundtrack. It's contagious. Things were just better back then... or at least I would think so. I was born 40 years too late. So this is my plea, Let's bring the 50's back all over the world. Let's all start wearing leather jackets, rock ducktails, drive motorcycles and cool cars, and just start partying to some classic music.

Love and Rockets,

Rodney

p.s. You may have noticed that all the things I said were for men. This is because women weren't allowed to do anything but plan dinner parties. Watch this video for an explanation.

p.p.s. I leave for California in T-minus 3 days 3 hours and 15 minutes!!!